How you been? My life has been one big swirly pile of dog poop lately because mom hates me. I know I haven't written in a while, but that's because we moved and I couldn't find you for the longest time. It was so stupy moving away. Now I never see my biffle Britta (my Briffla). Stephon is the only person I know in this new uggboots city, and he is pretty much useless. He spends all day up in his room. One time I went up there to tell him to come to dinner, and he was wearing a dress. It was super awk, so I just left the room. Then I realized something. Something I should have realized a long time ago. Stephon... has a girlfriend. I know it sounds really weird, because Stephon used to be so busy hanging out with Alex to go on dates, but now I know. Why else would he try on a dress? I can only guess that he wants to make sure his girlfriends prom dress is the right one. It's so nice of him.
Since I last wrote a lot has happened. We moved which is pretty obv. I also ended things with Zach. I told him, "Zach, we're a pretty good couple, but I just want different things." He played stupid and was like, "We're not a couple." Come on. I know what he was trying to do. He was trying to make it look like he ended it first so he could say he was the one to dump me. Well, it didn't work because the next day I hung posters around the school that said "I dumped Zach." I wasn't surprised that he didn't come to school that day. He was probly at home crying like a baby. I heard on the speaker in English class that we should keep him in our thoughts because he had been hit by car or something. Yeah right. I went around the rest of the day telling everyone it wasn't true. They looked at me like I was disgusting or something, but I think they saw through his lie too. Got hit by a bus? Sure, Zach.
Anyways, then I failed algebra, so I'm taking it again at this new stupid school. It's called Midvale Highschool. We live in a place called Youtaw. It's one of the great states of this great country we live in. This highschool is horrible. None of the girls know how to dress. They all wear really long skirts and what I heard one call "modest" clothing. What does that even mean? Do they not want boyfriends? I am getting lots of attention because I am apparently one of the "looser" girls around this school. But I am not even that skanky. My skirts are all at least 4 inches long, and my shirts cover at least 1/2 of my chest. I'm pretty sure none of the boys here have even seen a girl before because they all gawk at my hot bod. I'm taking spanish this year, which is pretty easy. I can even write a paper in spanish now. Here is a part of my most recent spanish essay:
I don't understand burritos. They are so gross, and the beans make you gassy. They probably eat the beans in a tortea. To hide the nastness inside.
My garderner, Guillermo, is mexican and he speaks spanish muy good. He also is very dark colored. It's probably cuz he hangs out in the sun all day doing nothing. It sounds rude, but he CUTS OUR PLANTS. Why would you grow a hedge if your going to just cut it. He is so stupid.
My teacher was so freaking mad at me. I don't even know why. I wrote about spanish culture. He told me I was being racist and I told him to go and *&^&^%$%#$&. He got really mad and sent me to the principals office. I tried flirting with the principal, but he didn't fall for it. He told me the other school had left a note on my transcript that I was a trouble maker. I said, "I am a NAUGHTY girl." He didn't get it. I winked at him and he sent me home. When I came home early mom freaked out. She said that I have gotten sent home one to many times and I need to be better.
Then dad cam home and he yelled at me too. He also said the worstest new I ever heard. He said that grandmonster is coming to live with us. I think I might die. I spent the whole night thinking about how I could get her plane to crash, or get her abducted by the mafia. I called the mafia hotline, but they said they couldn't help me.
I also found Stephon putting on my moisturizer again. It drives me crazy when he steals my creams.
Well that's all for tonight. I'll keep you updated.
-Aggie :)
